Thoughts I Had.....

In the time between the moment Keith Foulke grabbed the bouncer off the bat of Edgar Renteria and the time he tossed the ball over to Doug Mientkiewicz to complete the final out of the 2004 World Series, my whole life as a Red Sox fan passed before my eyes.

As I've said before, I am an adopted member of Red Sox Nation. As a non-native, I'm more a cousin, but I vividly remember almost every unfortunate moment of Boston's baseball history since 1975. I've also read more than enough books on baseball and the Sox to fill in the gaps that came before my time.

As Foulke turned and headed for firstbase, he hesitated just a second. It was almost a pump-fake or millisecond of fear, so desperately wanting to make a perfect toss to end the Series. In reality, he was probably just waiting for Mientkiewicz to get to first, but it prolonged the final out just long enough for my years as a Sox fan to flash before my eyes.

I thought of Dave Stapleton. The guy who should have been at firstbase in Game Six, 1986.

I thought of Bill Buckner. (Maybe Foulke may have, too, thus the millisecond of hesitation.) But, I think of how different his world would be if Stapleton was in the game in '86, as he was in all the World Series games prior to Game Six.

I thought of Jim Rice. A rookie outfielder in 1975, Rice missed the post-season after being hit by a Vern Ruhle pitch. Rice did play for the Sox in '86, but that '75 team was special. Rice could have made such a big difference versus the Reds.

I thought of Bruce Hurst who had his name on the 1986 World Series MVP Trophy only to have it removed.

I thought of all those who saw more Sox baseball than I who were finally going to see this nonsense end.

I also thought of all those who passed on without seeing the Sox win.

I also thought about Babe Ruth. I never thought there was a curse. I'm pretty sure Ruth cursed at quite a few people, but I never believed he placed any curses. On the Sox or anyone else. Ruth now gets to be embraced as one of the greatest Red Sox players ever.

I remembered the naive disappointment as an eleven year old in '75, the shock of '78, the heartbreak and sleepless nights of '86.

I recall reading The Curse of the Bambino, known in my household as the "Put Your Head In The Oven Book". Named after one of the reviews on the cover. (I considered burning the book after the Series, but I was told book burning was not a good idea.)

I remember my trip to Fenway Park.

Yeah, I remembered Bucky "Effin" Dent and Aaron "Effin" Boone, too.

Prior to the final out, I never, ever allowed myself to believe the Sox were going to win. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. After 1975 and 1986, I wasn't about to be fooled again. Up three games to none, winning 3-0 in the ninth inning of Game Four with two outs? Been there, done that. I need proof before I could let down my guard.

As Foulke trotted towards firstbase and history, I finally thought the one thing I refused to accept "They are really going to win the World Series". As Foulke underhanded the ball to Mientkiewicz, I could feel the weight of twenty-nine years lifted off my shoulders. It was equal parts joy and relief.

Immediately after the final out was recorded, I did think of so many others in Sox history. Apparently, Curt Schilling shared my thoughts, as he mentioned Bob Stanley, Calvin Schiraldi, Johnny Pesky and Buckner. I thought of them and Don Zimmer, Dominic DiMaggio, Roger Clemens, Wade Boggs, Luis Tiant, Carl Yastrzemski and countless others. I only wish they got their moment of World Series success.

That moment of Foulke's grab and lob over to first will probably be like a DVD in my head, stuck on a single scene playing over and over again. I'll probably recall the thoughts and feelings I had that moment every time I see that play. Before Wednesday, I never allowed myself to think the Sox would win the World Series, but I smile every single time I think about it now.